Category Archives: Uncategorized

hope

Three Lights in the Dark - Hope
photo by madison.murphy, through flickr

“Hope for the moment. There are times when it is hard to believe in the future, when we are temporarily just not brave enough. When this happens, concentrate on the present. Cultivate le petit bonheaur (the little happiness) until courage returns. Look forward to the beauty of the next moment, the next hour, the promise of a good meal, sleep, a book, a movie, the likelihood that tonight the stars will shine. Sink roots into the present until the strength grows to think about tomorrow.” Ardis Whitman

thanksgiving

I’m thankful…

for warm feather comforters, for hot running water, that I didn’t lose all my photos in the recent hard drive crash. For my snuggly little boy and my funny girl. For my husband. For my siblings, my parents, my cousins, my grandmother, my family. For scrapbooking. For excellent books. For notebooks and my favorite pen. For mail delivery. For clothing, delicious food, eggnog, my laptop. For love.

Happy Thanksgiving, all.

the sun’ll come out, tomorrow

Today I’ll be in the city all day long, with no computer (because why bother? without my photos and digi supplies I am bereft). But with friends, so that’ll be nice.

I’ll try to get over myself in the next entry.

a day out

We’ll see if I can get back to this later tonight and add photos or something. But for now let’s just say – we’re going to the dentist in the City, and then we’ll be visiting a couple friends and probably shopping. So many things to do – and I am NOT good at blowing through a whole bunch of stores in one go, even when I’m not hauling two kiddos along with me. But there is lunch at a Chinese buffet in my not-so-distant future, so yay!

random thought for the weekend

Remember when we (those of us who grew up in the 80s) were young? Remember how the only animated movies were Disney? Well, and a couple of usually slightly weird Don Bluth ones.

When did that change? And why exactly? Now there are tons of animated movies out there. (Even if most of them are computer animated, an entirely separate issue, perhaps I will go into it another time.) But I’m certainly glad it did change… now we have Pixar, and Kung Fu Panda, Surf’s Up, Ice Age 2, Miyazaki’s films, Madagascar, Shrek …

What’s your favorite? (Disney and non-)

grief, food, love

I don’t know yet, what I want to say, what I want to share here about this. Only that I want to put something up, because not to feels like pretending that nothing has changed. And that would be a lie.

My husband’s stepsister Carina died last Tuesday. She was 15. It was a car accident – though late at night, alcohol was apparently not involved – just a stupid mistake that could happen to pretty much anyone – their truck flipped – and they weren’t wearing their seat belts. Please my friends and readers, wear your seat belts. You can never tell what if… but the driver was okay, just from having the steering wheel to hold onto. I think seat belts would have made a difference.

In some ways, I didn’t know her as well as I’d’ve liked, though she came up and spent the weekend with us fairly regularly. She loved to get her picture taken, and it was always either her asking, or me offering. So I had some nice shots to offer – I had some enlargements made for the funeral. I wish I had more. I wish I didn’t have to wish I had more.

I’ve witnessed some remarkable things this past weekend – heard things (good things) said between certain family members I never would’ve expected to hear; maybe most of all been touched by the huge outpouring of grief and food, paper plates and manual labor, flowers, cards, more food, and most of all love in their small town, the town where my husband (and my mother) grew up. I have felt within myself, conflicting feelings of love and faith and perspective, and yet also grief and just feeling so lost and at loose ends sometimes. I know things have really just begun, especially for her mom, her stepdad, her siblings.

Carina — we miss you, your smile and laughter. There’s this Carina-shaped hole in our lives now, and it hurts to see it and feel it. I wish I could hear your laugh again, touch your hair, come up with some crazy photo shoot, maybe another on the roof. I wish you had time to grow out of the occasional teenage sulks and drama, that you could come up here and hang out and be bored at our house, babysit our kiddos again. I wish your little sister and brothers and niece and nephew could hug you and hang on you and drive you crazy. I know you can see it, but I wish you were here to feel your stepdad’s love, and your older brothers’ heartbreak over you. So many things, such depth of feeling, now that you’re gone – I wish there were another way to learn all this.

ALWAYS an INFP

So I found this cool description thing of INFPs (here is the link, and if you change the letters before the .htm it appears you will get the other type descriptions: http://www.geocities.com/lifexplore/infp.htm), and I wondered if I’m still an INFP, like I was in college. Turns out (according to multiple tests, not just the one below that I found on this board; I also like this test) the answer is YOU CANNOT ESCAPE YOUR DESTINY.


You Are An INFP


The Idealist

You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world.

Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships.

It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close.

But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.

In love, you tend to have high (and often unrealistic) standards.

You are very sensitive. You tend to have intense feelings.

At work, you need to do something that expresses your personal values.

You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

How you see yourself: Unselfish, empathetic, and spiritual

When other people don’t get you, they see you as: Unrealistic, naive, and weak