Way way back in the day, when I still kept a not-yet-called-a-blog on Diaryland, there was a blog on there called Quoted. Pretty simple – people submitted quotes, they were published with a link, I think it was weekly. No longer updated, but there were gems like this (from a blog that is now password protected, else I would link it here):
Oh, and while we were watching the show on E!, we heard some random noise outside, two or three times. It was hard to explain, but it was kinda deep and long..? I dunno.. but I was firmly convinced it was the Horn of Gondor.
I loved it (I was even quoted myself on it a time or two). Not to insult any of my real life friends, but I often yearn for really witty people in my life. (My husband and I do make each other laugh, yes. I’m just insatiable I guess. When it comes to words. Let me be clear here….) In lieu of that, the blogs, sometimes they give me the best lines ever, things that stay with me. So now I share a few of my favorite, somewhat-recent ones with you.
I assured him that while yes, I am a neurotic mess, autism has never once been on my list of Things That Could Be Wrong With My Kid. (Thing #1: Almost Too Cute And Delicious, Thus Irresistible To Bears.)
I visited Sephora last time I ventured out of my smallish town and I was completely befuddled. Have I ever mentioned that I don’t do well on multiple choice tests? I don’t. I also don’t do well on multiple choice stores and let me tell you, Sephora, is like one heck of a guessing game for me. And? There was no “All of the Above” option for my budget.
…NaBloPoMo (or something like that – you post every day for a month and who am I talking to? You people read the entire internet front to back everyday – I’m telling you nothing you didn’t already know, right?)
from defective yeti:
(An aside here, for the young men of Teh NetarWeb: don’t make the same mistake I did and fail to become a special education teacher. It’s a field populated exclusively by smart, beneficent, and heart-breakingly lovely lasses. I am so totally not kidding about this. Four years at a university and I did not spend as much time in the company of pretty college girls as Squiggle has in the two years since his diagnosis.)
also here (which is from last year, but may well be one of the awesomest things the english major in me has ever read):
Chapter 54: The Town-Ho’s Story is essentially a short story about another ship’s encounter with Moby-Dick. While long by the standard of most other chapters (it is twenty pages in length), it is considerably briefer than the 522 page account of the Pequod, and the author’s subtext appears to be: “Look at me! I can write tight, concise prose! When I feel like it! Which is never!”
from HeatherAnne (and how much do I love her header? so much):
what i wanted was
to write a haiku, but you
are all i think of
(and from the comments of that same entry)
is harder than it would seem
To those not in love.
from Available Light (on her NaNovel):
It looks like Jabberwocky by way of lolcats.
this is a “very” old one from Schmutzie, but it is so wondrous and comforting to me somehow:
I’m going to tell you something, and it may sound kind of magical, but listen. Whatever your decision is, however you come to it, it is the right one for you. You can’t make the wrong decision. It’s magical how it works, but it’s true.
ETA (I swear, I won’t add any more to this entry after the end of November; obviously I will have to start another draft of them though):
Because, dude: Girls + Makeup + Chocolate=NIRVANA. I wouldn’t have been shocked if Mr. Kurt Cobain strolled in with his cardigan and unwashed hair. If he had stopped by he would have looked dang pretty when he left because the person that was doing the makeup was amazing.